Rodes Education Workshop

Rodes Weekly Wrap-Up #22

2006-09-20T20:58:00.000+09:30

Indoor Soccer - Semi-Final
The Nutmegs

UnFit United, 13, defeated The Nutmegs, 4.
Personal goal tally: did not play
Cumulative goal tally: 19
Goals for/against: 172-108
Current standings: 14 wins - 5 losses - 1 bye (knocked out of finals)

Indoor Cricket - Round 12
Jamaican Redslacks

Did not play

Ultimate Frisbee - Round 8
Adelaide University Mojo

Mojo, 14, defeated Flycatchers, 7.
Current standings: 7 wins - 0 losses - 1 bye

Rodes Weekly Wrap-Up #21

2006-09-13T21:31:00.000+09:30

Indoor Soccer - Round 20
The Nutmegs

Trent, 10, defeated The Nutmegs, 5.
Personal goal tally: did not play
Cumulative goal tally: 19
Goals for/against: 168-95
Current standings: 14 wins - 5 losses - 1 bye

Indoor Cricket - Round 11
Jamaican Redslacks

Did not play

Ultimate Frisbee - Round 7
Adelaide University Mojo

Mojo, 12, defeated Flinders II, 8.
Current standings: 6 wins - 0 losses - 1 bye

Rodes Weekly Wrap-Up #20

2006-09-06T01:23:00.000+09:30

Indoor Soccer - Round 19
The Nutmegs

The Nutmegs, 9, defeated Unfit United, 5.
Personal goal tally: 2
Cumulative goal tally: 19
Goals for/against: 163-85
Current standings: 14 wins - 4 losses - 1 bye

Indoor Cricket - Round 10
Jamaican Redslacks

Did not play

Ultimate Frisbee - Round 6
Adelaide University Mojo

Mojo, 14, defeated Uni SA Meerkats, 7.
Current standings: 5 wins - 0 losses - 1 bye

Rodes Weekly Wrap-Up #19

2006-08-30T20:09:00.000+09:30

Indoor Soccer - Round 18
The Nutmegs

The Nutmegs, 3, defeated Ivory Coast Allstars, 1.
Personal goal tally: 0
Cumulative goal tally: 17
Goals for/against: 157-80
Current standings: 13 wins - 4 losses - 1 bye

Indoor Cricket - Round 9
Jamaican Redslacks

Did not play

Ultimate Frisbee - Round 5
Adelaide University (soon to have a name)

*Bye*
Current standings: 4 wins - 0 losses - 1 bye

Rodes Weekly Wrap-Up #18

2006-08-23T21:52:00.000+09:30

Indoor Soccer - Round 17
The Nutmegs

The Nutmegs, 14, defeated Just Do It, 1.
Personal goal tally: did not play
Cumulative goal tally: 17
Goals for/against: 154-79
Current standings: 12 wins - 4 losses - 1 bye

Indoor Cricket - Round 8
Jamaican Redslacks

Did not play

Ultimate Frisbee - Round 4
Adelaide University (soon to have a name)

Adelaide Uni, 13, defeated Flinders Fury, 8.
Current standings: 4 wins - 0 losses

Rodes Weekly Wrap-Up #17

2006-08-16T22:27:00.000+09:30

Indoor Soccer - Round 16
The Nutmegs

Skips, 10, defeated The Nutmegs, 4.
Personal goal tally: did not play
Cumulative goal tally: 17
Goals for/against: 140-78
Current standings: 11 wins - 4 losses - 1 bye

Indoor Cricket - Round 7
Jamaican Redslacks

Did not play

Ultimate Frisbee - Round 3
Adelaide University (soon to have a name)

Adelaide Uni, 8, defeated Flycatchers, 4.
Current standings: 3 wins - 0 losses

Rodes Weekly Wrap-Up #16

2006-08-09T21:51:00.000+09:30

Indoor Soccer - Round 15
The Nutmegs

The Nutmegs, 10, defeated Trent, 5.
Personal goal tally: did not play
Cumulative goal tally: 17
Goals for/against: 136-68
Current standings: 11 wins - 3 losses - 1 bye

Indoor Cricket - Round 6
Jamaican Redslacks

Did not play

Ultimate Frisbee - Round 2
Adelaide University (soon to have a name)

Adelaide Uni, 15, defeated Disc-Members, 4.
Current standings: 2 wins - 0 losses

Rodes Weekly Wrap-Up #15

2006-07-31T23:29:00.000+09:30

Indoor Soccer - Round 14
The Nutmegs

The Nutmegs, 10, defeated UnFit United, 6.
Personal goal tally: 0
Cumulative goal tally: 17
Goals for/against: 126-63
Current standings: 10 wins - 3 losses - 1 bye

Indoor Cricket - Round 5
Jamaican Redslacks

Jamaican Redslacks, 173, defeated I'd Hit It, 96.
Runs: 39
Two overs went for: 2
Current standings: 1 win - 4 losses

Ultimate Frisbee - Round 1
Adelaide University (soon to have a name)

Adelaide Uni, 15, defeated Disc-Graceful, 6.
Current standings: 1 win - 0 losses

Rodes Weekly Wrap-Up #14

2006-07-24T21:46:00.000+09:30

Indoor Soccer - Round 13
The Nutmegs

RSK, 12, defeated Ivory Coast Allstars, 8.
Personal goal tally: did not play
Cumulative goal tally: 17
Goals for/against: 124-69
Current standings: 9 wins - 3 losses - 1 bye

Indoor Cricket - Round 4
Jamaican Redslacks

Did not play

Unless You Sing, Sing, Sing...

2006-07-19T18:30:00.000+09:30

Last night was the latest in what is fast becoming a long series of crazy, drunken nights spent with the guys and gals from AUUFC. This time it was again at Phil's adopted mansion. Borgas and I brought the party: with us we took a PS2 (complete with four versions of SingStar), much beer, Tequila, Scotch, random hats and a shot luge (conceived and handcrafted by PB himself).

We started the night with beer and SingStar. Pizza came along shortly afterwards (at the last minute Mama Kaz backing out of her offer for people to "suck on her bosoms for a Margarita") and then it was straight back to SingStar. It is definitely one of the most enjoyable games on the market and it only gets better when you play it with a big bunch of enthusiastic people. Add alcohol to the mix and you have a right bangin' party. It is about here that my memory becomes very fuzzy as I try to chronologically piece together the parts of the night that I can still remember. Fortunately I had a camera on hand at all times to capture the madness.

Things became rapidly crazier when Borgas announced the grand opening of his shot luge. The ribbon was cut, the bottle of Champagne smashed against the hull, and everyone proceeded to take a shot. Participating shooters had the choice of Scotch, Gin, Tequila, strawberry liqueur, Sambuca, Vodka and Midori. Not on the menu was Balsamic vinegar but that didn't stop the
"O-Bahn" from downing a shot. What ensued was a sprint to the toilet.

Not content with standard shots, we upped the ante and created our own shots such as the "Christmas" (take one shot of Midori, add one shot of strawberry liqueur and sing Jingle Bells). The Sambuca and strawberry liqueur combo was probably one of the worst taste sensations possible. Just looking at it slide down the luge made me shiver.

Ice Ice Baby

Getting BJ drunk was always an aim of ours, especially given that this was our first real opportunity to do so. However, he did a great job of getting himself drunk. So great, in fact, that he was hugging the toilet for about three hours.

BJ and I did many Tequila Slammers but those efforts (in truth, all efforts) were topped by Borgas and Kaz who set the benchmark for the evening by performing Tequila Stuntmen. Snort the salt, shoot the Tequila, squeeze the lemon in the eye. It was simply glorious to watch but probably less so for those with citric acid in their eyes and salt granules up their snouts.

Tequila!

Then it was back to SingStar for a battle. In the blue corner was Kaz, Wazza, Huy and myself and in the red corner was Tara, Richie, Bruce and Prue. During one of the rounds in which the singer has to maintain a performance of at least 50% for as long as possible, Wazza bombed out after 20 seconds (and that includes 15 seconds of instrumental). Us blueys thought we were in the shit as Bruce only had to last for six seconds to win the round. But sure enough, he also lost the plot after five seconds in what was probably the shortest and funniest round in SingStar history. In the end it came down to the final, seventh round which the blue team took out emphatically (I think).

SingStar

It was back for more shot luge action as the crowd started to thin and the men were separated from the mice. More Slammers, more Stuntmen and before we knew it, it was 5am. So what better to do than settle down in front of the TV and watch Mr & Mrs Smith. The O-Bahn had the bright idea to make a damper which turned out nicely and was superb with peanut butter. Goodnight!

Rodes Weekly Wrap-Up #13

2006-07-17T21:40:00.000+09:30

Indoor Soccer - Round 12
The Nutmegs

The Nutmegs, 18, defeated Ivory Coast Allstars, 7.
Personal goal tally: 6
Cumulative goal tally: 17
Goals for/against: 116-57
Current standings: 9 wins - 2 losses - 1 bye

Indoor Cricket - Round 3
Jamaican Redslacks

VVS, 125, defeated Jamaican Redslacks, 27.
Runs: 6
Two overs went for: 0
Current standings: 0 wins - 3 losses

A Jam Called Strawberry

2006-07-13T16:38:00.000+09:30

A few people have recently requested that I post something other than my recent sporting results. As much as I would like to, these days I just can't be arsed. I suspected from the birth of my blog that something like this would happen - loss of motivation. However, I reckon I can pull myself out of this hole I've dug and get back on my horse (a gelding, named Rebecca).

Last night we went to pseudo-Timewarp at Rapture, called Retro. A dull and unimaginative name to be sure, although feeling those old Timewarp beats again was well overdue and cause for dancing till exhaustion. There was Captain Kirk (who I high-fived :D), post-baby Barbarella (who poked me as she brushed past :|) and those ever-present dancers to boot. They even hosted yet another Big Brother reject (cue Katie's hideous laugh and then quip at her alleged virginity).

Rapture being a small venue means that drinks are not as cheap as they were at Heaven, however, they do at least have Pale Ale on tap. I must say that I hope Timewarp is reinstated at Heaven (if it's still called that) when it re-opens, whenever that may be. Its sheer size makes the experience that much more enjoyable. The existence of a proper stage is also beneficial as you can be close to the speakers yet still be well distanced from the fright that is Barbarella.

Fun was had by all, especially Sam and I who were both propositioned by a scary beast. She managed to fall backwards off a dancing block and ask to take Sam home all within about five minutes. Borgas got his groove on but was disappointed by the lack of Patrick Hernandez songs. Hailey almost pimped out Chloe, Tristan held his beers, Ben cut loose, footloose and Ravo basked in the glow that was a more attractive specimen than the beast.

Rodes Weekly Wrap-Up #12

2006-07-10T20:53:00.000+09:30

Indoor Soccer - Round 11
The Nutmegs

The Nutmegs, 4, defeated Skips, 2.
Personal goal tally: 0
Cumulative goal tally: 11
Goals for/against: 98-50
Current standings: 8 wins - 2 losses - 1 bye

Indoor Cricket - Round 2
Jamaican Redslacks

Blis, 141, defeated Jamaican Redslacks, 64.
Runs: 29
Two overs went for: 8
Current standings: 0 wins - 2 losses

Rodes Weekly Wrap-Up #11

2006-07-02T16:33:00.000+09:30

Indoor Soccer - Round 10
The Nutmegs

The Nutmegs, 16, defeated UnFit United, 12.
Personal goal tally: 3
Cumulative goal tally: 11
Goals for/against: 94-48
Current standings: 7 wins - 2 losses - 1 bye

Rodes Weekly Wrap-Up #10

2006-06-25T22:19:00.000+09:30

Indoor Cricket - Semi Final
Jamaican Redslacks

The Van Buren Boys, 144, defeated Jamaican Redslacks, 99.
Runs: 18
Two overs went for: 9
Current standings: eliminated from finals

Indoor Soccer - Round 9
The Nutmegs

Random Hoegard FC, 7, defeated The Nutmegs, 4.
Personal goal tally: 0
Cumulative goal tally: 8
Goals for/against: 78-36
Current standings: 6 wins - 2 losses - 1 bye

Rodes Weekly Wrap-Up #9

2006-06-18T20:00:00.000+09:30

Indoor Cricket - Round 15 (last game before finals)
Jamaican Redslacks

Jamaican Redslacks, 90, defeated Boon Laden, 54.
Runs: 18
Two overs went for: -6 (including a hat-trick)
Final standings: 10 wins - 5 losses

*Finished the season in second place behind Boon Laden. Semi-final is tomorrow night.*

Ultimate Frisbee - Round 13 (last game of season)
The Dangerous Mushrooms

Fly Catchers, 12, defeated The Dangerous Mushrooms, 7.
Final standings: 8 wins - 1 tie - 4 losses

Indoor Soccer - Round 8
The Nutmegs

*BYE*

12:15am, Tuesday, 13th June, 2006

2006-06-13T18:03:00.000+09:30

If I had to compile a list of the top 10 sporting moments in my life, there is no question that Australia's emphatic, come-from-behind victory against Japan last night is number one. I don't think I've ever yelled my lungs out so much, or drained my adrenal glands more. It is without a doubt a sweeter moment than any that springs to mind. Come on Aussies, let's go for the big one and create a stir!

Rodes Weekly Wrap-Up #8

2006-06-11T22:20:00.000+09:30

Indoor Cricket - Round 14
Jamaican Redslacks

Jamaican Redslacks, 127, defeated Golden Ducks, 126. We needed 36 off the last two overs and we scored the winning run off the last ball! Cracking victory!
Runs: 17
Two overs went for: 14
Current standings: 9 wins - 5 losses

Ultimate Frisbee - Round 12
The Dangerous Mushrooms

Uni SA Moths, 10, defeated The Dangerous Mushrooms, 7.
Current standings: 8 wins - 1 tie - 3 losses

* No Indoor Soccer Matches This Week *

Rodes Weekly Wrap-Up #7

2006-06-04T20:39:00.000+09:30

Indoor Cricket - Round 13
Jamaican Redslacks

Jamaican Redslacks, 119, defeated The Van Buren Boys, 100.
Runs: 23
Two overs went for: 18
Current standings: 8 wins - 5 losses

Ultimate Frisbee - Round 11
The Dangerous Mushrooms

Da Frizz, 7, defeated The Dangerous Mushrooms, 5.
Current standings: 8 wins - 1 tie - 2 losses

Indoor Soccer - Round 7
The Nutmegs

The Nutmegs, 17, defeated Three Lions, 6.
Personal goal tally: 1
Cumulative goal tally: 8
Goals for/against: 74-29
Current standings: 6 wins - 1 loss

Rodes Weekly Wrap-Up #6

2006-05-28T18:14:00.000+09:30

Indoor Cricket - Round 12
Jamaican Redslacks

The Bad Seeds, 100, defeated Jamaican Redslacks, 61.
Runs: 0
Two overs went for: 27
Current standings: 7 wins - 5 losses

Ultimate Frisbee - Round 10
The Dangerous Mushrooms

The Dangerous Mushrooms, 15, defeated Da Frizz, 0.
Current standings: 8 wins - 1 tie - 1 loss

Indoor Soccer - Round 6
The Nutmegs

The Nutmegs, 15, defeated Ivory Coast All Stars, 3.
Personal goal tally: 3
Cumulative goal tally: 7
Goals for/against: 57-23
Current standings: 5 wins - 1 loss

Rodes Weekly Wrap-Up #5

2006-05-21T17:48:00.000+09:30

Indoor Cricket - Round 11
Jamaican Redslacks

Jamaican Redslacks, 159, defeated Smegwortz, 108.
Runs: 29
Two overs went for: -15
Current standings: 7 wins - 4 losses

Ultimate Frisbee - Round 9
The Dangerous Mushrooms

The Dangerous Mushrooms, 10, defeated UE, 5.
Current standings: 7 wins - 1 tie - 1 loss

Indoor Soccer - Round 5
The Nutmegs

The Nutmegs, 11, defeated Skips, 4.
Personal goal tally: 1
Cumulative goal tally: 4
Goals for/against: 42-20
Current standings: 4 wins - 1 loss

Rodes Weekly Wrap-Up #4 [Goes Tabloid]

2006-05-14T19:48:00.000+09:30

That's right, it's departing life as a broadsheet and becoming concise and chock full of advertisements. Okay, scrap that last point...

Indoor Cricket - Round 10
Jamaican Redslacks

The Chuckies, 129, defeated Jamaican Redslacks, 84.
Current standings: 6 wins - 4 losses

Ultimate Frisbee - Round 8
The Dangerous Mushrooms

The Dangerous Mushrooms, 10, defeated JJ, 3.
Current standings: 6 wins - 1 tie - 1 loss

Indoor Soccer - Round 4
The Nutmegs

Random Hoegard, 6, defeated The Nutmegs, 5.
Personal goal tally: 0
Cumulative goal tally: 3
Goals for/against: 31-16
Current standings: 3 wins - 1 loss

Rodes Weekly Wrap-Up #3

2006-05-07T22:34:00.000+09:30

Monday, 1st May: Indoor Cricket - Round 9
Jamaican Redslacks

Pbas: 148
Jamaican Redslacks: 118

The Pbas was the first of the Div 1 teams that we are scheduled to play. We kept them to 21 off the first 3 overs at which point I came on to bowl. My first ball was a wicket which reduced them to a shaky 16. Unfortunately, the rest of my over (including three re-bowled extras) was shithouse and they managed to end their first partnership on 40. Thankfully, my second over was much better and only went for 2.

Overs: 19 & 2

Batting was a little disappointing. I only faced 10 out of 32 balls, of which only eight were playable. I scored 17. My partner faced 22 balls for a meagre three runs. That pissed me off a great deal.

Runs: 17

Current standings: 6 wins - 3 losses

Wednesday, 3rd May: Ultimate Frisbee - Round 7
The Dangerous Mushrooms

The Dangerous Mushrooms: 12
Flinders University Social: 4

It was revenge time for the Mushies. We played these folks back in round one and got beaten 11-5. We skipped away to a 2-0 lead, but they came back with the next three points to lead 3-2. However, that was to be their first and final challenge as we dominated the rest of the match. It was also my first match as co-captain. However, this meant little besides having to do the obligatory post-match pep-talk.

Current standings: 5 wins - 1 tie - 1 loss

Sunday, 7th May: Indoor Soccer - Round 3
The Nutmegs

The Nutmegs: 9
UnFit United: 6

We started playing on one of the big courts, and conceded a soft goal after about a minute. Then, Glenn Duffield came over and moved us to the small court because we were playing next to a bunch of five year olds and he didn't want us to kill them. So we resumed with 19:00 on the clock and proceeded to concede the next three goals (one of which was a soft own-goal by me). So we were down 4-0 and things weren't looking good. At the half-time break, we were down 6-3. In the second half we sorted out our defence, lifted our intensity and went on to score six goals to zero to win a great match.

Personal goal tally: 1
Cumulative goal tally: 3
Goals for/against: 26-10
Current standings: 3 wins - 0 losses

Rodes Weekly Wrap-Up #2

2006-04-30T17:57:00.000+09:30

Monday, 24th April: Indoor Cricket - Round 8
Jamaican Redslacks

Jamaican Redslacks: 138
The Bad Seeds: 154

Points to note:

We batted first for the first time in several rounds and compiled a relatively competitive total
The old adage 'catches win matches' once again proved true as several catches went down in the last few overs which could have landed us a win
For some reason we - a division 3 team - are playing the top two division 1 teams in the next few rounds...wtf?

Current standings: 6 wins - 2 losses

*No Ultimate Frisbee matches this week*

Sunday, 30th April: Indoor Soccer - Round 2
The Nutmegs

The Dee Vees: 1
The Nutmegs: 12

Points to note:

Scores were locked at 1-1 after a tense first 10 minutes or so
The score was 4-1 until we added 8 goals in the last 13 minutes
Celebrated Anisha's 21st birthday the night before and didn't get home til 6am, however, still managed to perform fairly well
Starting to believe that getting pissed and having very little sleep before sport actually improves performance
Currently absolutely knackered

Personal goal tally: 2
Cumulative goal tally: 2
Goals for/against: 17-4
Current standings: 2 wins - 0 losses

Frisbees: Express from the United States

2006-04-27T17:04:00.000+09:30

About a week ago I ordered three frisbees from an online store in America. And today, much to my joy, they arrived. These babies are sweet. From left to right, they are; Glo Wurm (glows in the dark), Planet Earth and Clockwork Orange.

Enlarge it. You know you want to.

Glow, baby.

Watch out for these rippers slicing through the air in a park near you!

Rodes Weekly Wrap-Up #1

2006-04-23T20:53:00.000+09:30

Tonight I made my long-awaited return to the indoor soccer arena after a six month layoff with a knee injury. We played a team called 'The Deros' who certainly lived up to their name. Bunch of wankers, especially the chunky guy with glasses (who also refused to shake hands after the match). We were ultimately triumphant in winning 5-3.

One of the most amusing calls of all time came from this very guy at half time when he yelled out "They've got nothing, they're just a bunch of Aussies". Well good call, mate. You may have Italian heritage but being born and raised in this country makes you an Aussie too. Oh, and you lost. Pity. We may have "nothing", but we've got a hell of a lot more than you. There's "nothing" more satisfying than beating a pack of shitheads.

Anyway, I digress. I came through the match unscathed and with my knee intact. So indoor soccer will once again be a part of my weekly routine. This now means that I have sporting commitments from Sunday through Wednesday and due to this, I will probably become broke.

I am now proud to present the inauguration of the Rodes Weekly Wrap-Up (tm) which will briefly detail the matches played in each week.

Monday, 17th April: Indoor Cricket - Round 7
Jamaican Redslacks

The Swamp Donkeys: 58
Jamaican Redslacks: 218

Points to note:

The Swamp Donkeys sucked and we took advantage of this
For the second time this season we cracked the 200 barrier

Current standings: 6 wins - 1 loss

Wednesday, 19th April: Ultimate Frisbee - Round 6
The Dangerous Mushrooms

Social Flying Catchers: 1
The Dangerous Mushrooms: 10

Points to note:

To put it simply, we dominated play
After scoring the first nine points, the result was beyond doubt
The majority of our team members have never played ultimate before and despite this, we are really coming together as a team

Current standings: 4 wins - 1 tie - 1 loss.

Sunday, 23rd April: Indoor Soccer - Round 1
The Nutmegs

The Deros: 3
The Nutmegs: 5

Points to note:

Opposition were wankers
I challenged the referees on a decision which led to one of their goals being disallowed
This pissed them off immensely much to my liking

Personal goal tally: 0
Cumulative goal tally: 0
Goals for/against: 5-3
Current standings: 1 win - 0 losses

Soaring to Dizzy Heights

2006-04-19T00:11:00.000+09:30

"For the first time ever, Australia played and built a total around Gillespie." Well that just about sums it up, doesn't it?

As Jason 'Dizzy' Gillespie blocked, prodded and cover-drove his way towards his maiden Test century, I couldn't help but smile in admiration for one of my favourite players. Since he was reselected in the Australian Test team he has been nothing short of impressive. So far he has taken eight wickets in three innings. Not a bad effort considering that both the pitches they've played on have heavily favoured the spinners. Add to this a century and I reckon he deserves all-rounder status. If not that, then at least 'nightwatchman with bite' status.

His innings also reminded me of his last wicket partnership with Glenn McGrath against New Zealand a year or so back when they both made fifties. I'm not sure which is sweeter - McGrath making a 50 (included in that a slog sweep for his first and only six) or Dizzy making a ton. Probably the latter. McGrath sports a customised bat with '61' emblazoned on the splice. Will Diz follow suit? He certainly deserves it.

In The Cold, Cold Night

2006-04-15T19:57:00.000+09:30

I'm sure quite a few things happened last night. Unfortunately my memory of some of the evening is a tad patchy, so reader feedback is encouraged. Of course there are some things one couldn't forget even in an advanced state of inebriation. For example, Tyson licking Corona off the floor (on which everyone had walked) for $2.70. Here are pictures from the evening and the video of Tyson. You'll need Quicktime to watch the video.

Seeing as you were probably there, I'm not going to recount other events of the night. If you did come and took photos, I'd like to get copies from you sometime. Cheers. Thanks to all who came! I know you did, Paul.

Something To Blog About

2006-04-10T09:10:00.000+09:30

Last Friday was the last day of term. It also happened to coincide with an awesome pubcrawl. Put these two together and you get what was a pretty awesomely fun night.

Starting off at the Unibar (using term 1 coupons while they were still valid), I met Til, Barbara and Anisha. I downed a couple of quick ones and then I was told that we were heading off to an 'underground' dentistry party in the Medical School. What I didn't realise at first was that by underground, they meant physically. It was actually pretty tame, especially considering we missed out on $1 cowboys. It was also pretty stuffy a few floors underground in a room full of toothies and where there was apparently no ventilation.

A $2.50 Bitburger later, we skedaddled. It being a private party, you had to be let in. So, the door upstairs was closed and unable to be opened from the outside. Til had the bright idea of propping the door open with a chair to make it easy for people who were arriving to walk straight in. What transpired next was the first of many funny events that occurred on the night. Just as Til (by this stage mildly intoxicated) announced loudly to the group of people outside: "I left the door open guys, you can go straight in", an alarm sounded (also loudly) because the door had been left open for too long. We half ran, half stumbled away from the building and up Frome Road with the alarm ringing in the background. Fortunately, we weren't hounded by security.

I split up with those three - who nicked off home - and joined the LSD pubcrawl at PJ's. For those not in the know, LSD stands for Leafy Sea Dragons, the girls' Ultimate Frisbee team. The night was part of a fundraiser to help them get to play interstate.

Unfortunately, my adventures in the dentistry underworld had cost me about 55 out of 60 minutes of PJ's $4 imperial pints. That left time for only one before we headed on over to the Elephant. The number of pubcrawlers was starting to rise just in time for the first frisbee-skull. A standard frisbee holds almost exactly three imperial pints of beer. So, it was the battle of the sexes as three girls took on three guys, skulling beer out of a frisbee through a straw. Who won?

Apologies for the poor quality pic. Guys' disc is in the foreground (they lost and shamed themselves in the process).

Three scotch and cokes, then it was off to Hungry Jack's. Tom (other Tom) happened to know the girl behind the counter, so he, Mat and I got a free meal each. But Tom thought he'd taken a bit too much from poor Hungry Jack's, so to give them something in return, he chundered several times in their toilet while I flattened his burger with my fist. Tom finished his technicolour yawn and departed for the architecture pubcrawl.

Mathew and I headed on over to the Griffin's Head where another frisbee-skull took place (no idea who won that one). Highlights here included $3 cowboys and our choice of music on the jukebox. Things went up a notch when we decided to throw the frisbee outside in Hindmarsh Square. Things were likely to be interesting considering how much we all had had to drink, however, most throws seemed to be straight. Admittedly, I did almost hit a random girl in the face.

On the way to the Austral, we chucked the disc back and forth across Rundle Street. Amazingly, our throws were very accurate and we linked up with each other perfectly. We arrived at the Austral unscathed and took up our positions at the bar once again. Here we ran into Dave, Tim, Sam, Emma, Ravo and Jordan and his band.

Talking to Jordan outside was interesting. I was introduced to his band who seemed nice enough, however, his drummer was a little too drunk methinks. He fell backwards off his chair and then while I was shaking his hand he practically pulled me on top of him. This is when the bouncer intervened and told the guy to let me go and gave him a final warning. Barely minutes later he fell off his chair again and the bouncer got rid of him. His shirt read "Not Violent When Drunk". Not exactly ironic, but enough for some laughs.

Sometime after this, we decided that it was time to throw the frisbee again. This time it was down the street next to the Austral. Our first two throws struck both the bouncers' cars. The bouncers didn't appreciate this and gave Mathew a lecture. Shortly after tiring ourselves out, we decided to head back to the Elephant where I met a girl who was studying to be a vet. She seemed quite at ease talking to me about her encounters with male animals and their appendages (you can be spared the intricate details). I think that in my state of intoxication I was happy to talk about anything.

At some stage we all got kicked out of the Elephant and that signalled the end of a pretty entertaining evening.

Where's My Life Gone?

2006-04-04T16:09:00.000+09:30

This post is dedicated to Brenno, who has complained on more than one occasion about the lack of updates.

Okay, so it has been a while. In fact, almost a month. I read Borgas' latest post and I have to agree with him in that uni is taking over. When I take into account sport (three times a week, soon to be four), work (have worked the last six or seven weekends in a row) and homework, it leaves me with only one or two free nights a week. These free nights are normally spent catching up on uni work. It sucks. The engies pubcrawl was the first time I'd been out in well over a month. 'Me time' is certainly at a premium. That said, the pubcrawl was - as it always is - a lot of fun.

It is really only the sport that is keeping me going. Ultimate Frisbee is definitely one of the more fun sports I've picked up in recent times. It's fast-paced and skilful. Indoor cricket still kicks arse. Last night we thrashed a team that was new to the competition. After restricting them to just 43 runs - to which their opening partnership contributed 33 - from their 16 overs, we piled on 228 which included an opening partnership of 97 (24.25 runs per over). This was in stark contrast to the opposition's third partnership of -16. I think we achieved about three hat-tricks over the course of their innings. Needless to say, we are pumped for next week.

Here's a look at what's coming up.

7th April: Last day of term, French assignment due, LSD pubcrawl
10th April: I depart teenhood and enter the 20s, first official day of holidays
14th April: Party at mine to celebrate said birthday
18th April: Linguistics assignment due
23rd April: New indoor soccer season starts, I make my long awaited return from injury
Sometime in the 2nd week of holidays: Let's go freakin' paintballing

Designated Resignation

2006-03-06T19:14:00.000+10:30

Phew. Today I officially resigned from a certain printing business, the source of my income for the last two and a bit years. And boy, does it feel good. It had been a long time coming and compounded by the fact that I'd become almost completely redundant. Today's three hour shift is likely to be my last (hopefully).

I started working there full-time back in February 2004 when I had deferred my first year at uni. It took me little more than a couple of months to realise that not only was the business a backwards shambles, but that it was run and owned by a cheap, cunt of a man. It was then that I planned my escape from the imploding pile of shit.

The company has consistently struggled to keep their employees. This is hardly surprising when you take into account the ridiculously low pay, below-par working conditions and the general shit that is heaped onto you by the boss and managers. In my time, I have seen many an employee come and go. I predicted a mass exodus and contrary to others' beliefs, it came true. Employees walked out the door (including me from full-time work), large and lucrative government tenders were lost (due to the fact that I, a hard-working person who gets things done, was replaced by workers who more resembled clinically dead monkeys) and just recently, it has been revealed that one of the offices will be closing down.

Hence "the imploding pile of shit". So I say good riddance to bad rubbish.

The News I've Been Waiting To Hear Since Last October

2006-02-27T17:09:00.002+10:30

During an indoor soccer match last October, I twisted my knee which caused instantaneous pain. This pain would disappear a couple of days after the incident but, as I found out the following weekend, would come back if I attempted to play soccer. However, I could play any other sport seemingly without any problems. Physiotherapy, x-rays and an MRI scan would take place over the following four months in an attempt to reveal just exactly what the bloody hell was going on.

So finally, after being in the dark about the actual problem for four months, I went to see my specialist today who had in his possession the films from my scan. The verdict: "Subtle changes in the menisco-capsular attachments posteriorly on the medial side and subtle, probably resolving bone bruising in the medial compartment. No meniscal tear or osteochondral injury."

The specialist explained to me that this is a pretty minor, yet quite annoying injury. It is annoying due to the fact that it only flares up when my knee is subject to the actions of kicking or tackling, and the fact that it is healing very slowly. He also said that I can't really make it any worse as long as I don't play soccer. It has taken four months already just to get to this stage, therefore, my specialist was unable to give me an accurate estimation as to when it might be completely healed. His opinion, however, is that it could possibly be another three months until I can resume playing soccer. The only way I can determine whether or not it has healed is to play soccer. The good news for me is that there will be no surgery required (thank *insert preferred deity*!) and I can continue to play all the other sports that I love. Much relief is now being felt.

Have You Got The Fear?

2006-02-20T21:39:00.000+10:30

Today marked the beginning of O-Week, 2006. Amongst updating my student card, joining the bridge club and catching up with people not seen since the previous year, I watched the first "White Fear" competition of the year.

I had just purchased a beer, however, the competition was being held out of the legal beer zone. So, in order to get close to the fearsome action, Agent Borgas distracted the security guard while I jumped the fence and hid behind the bizarre piece of art on the Barr-Smith Lawns.

In every year's competitions, you'll be sure to see a guy called Alex participating. He is the undisputed king of White Fear. I have never seen anyone else come close to him. In fact, to really demonstrate his prowess in the sport, he downed his regulation four litres of milk well in advance of the other competitors and then proceeded to tackle - and conquer - another two litres. Stomach capacity: three litres. Milk consumed: six litres. Needless to say, there was some regurgitation. In a rare feat, however, a challenger finished his four litres and managed to hold it all down. Apparently this is anatomically impossible.

Here are some pictures for your viewing pleasure. Click for larger versions.

While the other competitors were getting ready, Alex was just about already chucking

Out it comes

Check out the splash

The angry vomiter

Hold your lips, out your nose

Julia, in the blue shirt, never finished her four litres of milk. In fact, she was kneeling down, perched over her bucket for about half an hour after the competition finished. Who would've thought that much milk could be bad for you?

Toast Art and Drunk Dog

2006-02-10T02:57:00.000+10:30

Intriguing, eh? Well, I went to a barbeque at Tyson's place yesterday and some interesting discoveries were made. The first one was that dogs become drunk very easily. Tyson fed his own dog (Pepper, an annoying little bitch, for the record) half a Corona (premium freaking beer) and before long she was staggering around the place and had lost her normal snappiness. If anyone she doesn't know tries to pat her while there is food in the near vicinity, she will try to bite you. However, under the influence of Mexican beer, her reaction time was noticibly slower than when sober.

She genuinely looked spaced out. So, I took my chances and patted her. It all seemed to be going well, so I turned away before stopping patting her and just as my hand left her head, I heard (and others saw) her take a bite. Fortunately, she just missed her target. She was about three seconds too slow.

Paro Pepper

Secondly, we discovered that Mathew is quite adept at the art of toast, erm, art. Toast art. It involves burning the crap out of a piece of bread until it resembles pure charcoal and then carving away at it with a knife. His first piece depicted a random face. Upon the discovery of this unique work and after much encouragement, he then challenged himself by undertaking an impression of the Tooheys Buck. This was indeed impressive, as I'm sure you'll agree.

"The Face"

"The Buck"
Fucking impressive. Click for a larger version.

Mathew salvaged this piece of sculpted toast and took it home. Keep your eyes peeled for upcoming exhibitions. I was quite curious about toast art, so, when I got home, I decided to have a quick poke around the web to see what I could find on the subject. Behold!

This is a mosaic made up of 3,053 individual slices of toast.

Who's hungry?

Item Left At BBQ

2006-02-04T13:38:00.000+10:30

Someone left this at my place during the barbeque. Does anyone know who it belongs to?

Much Ado About Barbeque

2006-02-03T22:12:00.000+10:30

Yesterday I hosted a BBQ on a day whose weather turned out to be just about perfect. The rain that had been forecast earlier in the week buggered off the previous night, so, we were left with a partly cloudy, yet fine day. It was perfect for ball sports (soccer, footy, tennis ball throwing and who could forget the old classic get-ball- stuck-in-tree-then-get-other-ball-stuck-in-tree-while-trying-to- dislodge-first-stuck-ball-consequently-spending-15-minutes- throwing-sticks-at-tree-to-dislodge-both-balls).

We loaded up eskies with beer, soft drinks and expensive ice, stuck the meat in the fridge and waited for people to roll in. Danny and Paul were the volunteer chefs (for the first round). Danny used an ancient Greek barbeque technique to cook mind-blowingly tender cuts of meat. Well, so he told me anyway.

After the first round of lunch, the sporting arena opened its gates and we flooded out for some kicks. A soccer scratch match broke out, but not before Ben managed to perch the soccer ball in a gum tree (see above). This is not ordinarily special as it happens all the time, however, Ben placed the kick so perfectly that the ball was almost at the top of the tree and seemingly supported by only about three leaves. That effort deserved top marks. So, we proceeded to try to dislodge it with the footy but that too ended up stuck in the tree. Many a stick was subsequently hurled with the end result being the eventual retrieval of both balls.

A few more people had since rocked up, so it was on to round two of lunch. Upon completion of the second lunch and the soccer match, there was only one obvious event that could follow: The Slalom Wheelchair Specacular! See Ben's blog for the course details. I didn't have much luck challenging the ultimate champion in Ben with my best time being 19.8 seconds. Ben's 15.3 was red hot. Much fun was had by athletes and spectators alike.

Danny looking possessed

Mathew raring for action

Awww

Shano, Paul, Tammy and Danny

David and Lanky

Borgas, Howie and Ben

Nick, Nev and Steve

Wills, Danny, Alex and Pete

No comment required

Not pictured are Tyson, Adrian and Tristan.

This is a video of Mathew displaying his prowess on a wheelchair. It's only 1mb, but you will need Quicktime to view it. I do apologise for this, Quicktime is the Devil himself. Anyway, all in all, it was a good day. Thanks go to all who attended!

Congratulations! You Are Now an Australian Citizen!

2006-01-26T23:53:00.000+10:30

Boy. If I had 5c for everytime I heard that, I'd certainly be a very poor man. Happy Australia Day guys. Let's hope you spent it doing something quintessentially Australian.

I went to the cricket today (quintessentially Australian), listened to Triple J's Hottest 100 (quintessentially Australian) and spent eight consecutive hours in the sun (quintessentially Australian?). That's right, and it was freakin' hot as you would well know. Lack of foresight - not the fault of mine - and an incredible lack of general admission seating meant that Mathew, his dad and brother, Adrian and I were forced to sit (5%) and stand (95%) in the blazing sun all day.

I suggested we get to the oval at around midday, no later. We arrived at between 12.15 and 12.30 (the gates having opened at 11.00) and it was chockers. Not a single scerick of grass to be seen. What dumbfounded me was that the space on our beloved northern hill (my favourite part of the ground) had been decimated due to a temporary stand and a whole bunch of plastic chairs that had been set up. Every single seat in the ground (including the aforementioned plastic chairs) were reserved for higher paying tickets. That left the small amount of grass and the concrete walkways for general admission ticket-holders. Now, correct me if I'm wrong, but ain't the point of having grassy areas at Adelaide Oval so that they can be used as grassy areas?

Mathew correctly pointed out that the two hills at Adelaide are what make the oval so nice and picturesque. The administrators hacked away at our oval, cost us and whole lot of others seats all so the corporate fatcats could earn a few extra clams. Bastards, that's all I can say.

And on top of all this, although the pitch was slow and tricky for batting, the match really was a bit of a fizzer. There wasn't much excitement out in the middle. Most of the memorable moments came from the crowd. They started with the ejection of a not-so-fine-and-upstanding gentleman who was ejected but 35 minutes after play started. Other crowd highlghts included a Mexican Wave that lasted at least seven or eight revolutions and happening to stand in front of a guy with a spray gun who sprayed attractive young women as they passed which resulted in me getting regularly sprayed. Also, some people carrying a Boonie banner managed to find a guy who was a spitting image of the real David Boon.

Some lowlights: the heat, a not-so-exciting match and some bogan women who prior to today were unaware as to what a six was and who spent a lot of the day shrieking and generally behaving in an annoying fashion. However, all in all, it was a good day.

Well, that's my job done. I managed to use fatcat and quintessential in the same piece of writing. Super.

Lay-off

2006-01-22T22:55:00.000+10:30

I'm back after experiencing some technical problems. Stay tuned for more exhausting news.

Out They Come!

2005-12-07T15:38:00.000+10:30

Quoted more or less accurately by my orthodontist a little over three months ago. Of course, what he was referring to were my wisdom teeth. All four of the bastards were removed last Wednesday, so, as I'm sure you can imagine, the subsequent days have been somewhat less than enjoyable.

I had to arrive at St Andrews at 7am on the day in question, which meant awaking at 6am. I hadn't been up that early in at least a year. I wasn't even up that early to watch the soccer a few weeks back. Anyway, there I was. The longer I sat (in the emergency area, for some reason), the more I started to realise how much I would dread the following week. And dread it, I have.

It was initially the pain and discomfort that unsettled me, however, it is now moreso my inability to eat any solid foods. Still, now a week on, I can barely open my mouth. I have been on a diet of yoghurt, smoothies, mousse, icecream and movies. Now, this might not sound too bad, but, when I walked into the kitchen last night and smelt toast and peanut butter, I could've just about cried. It is the simple pleasures in life that I am really missing at the moment. Toast is one of these. I'd give anything to be able to chomp on something crunchy.

Of course, my face had also vastly increased in size. A few days ago, it resembled a cartoon character. The swelling has now all but receded but it has left behind a big yellow band of bruising from one cheek, under the chin, to the other cheek. The pain has mostly gone, now it's just a persistent dull ache.

I had my orthodontist check up yesterday to make sure everything was in order. Fortunately, the wounds aren't infected (unlike those of my brother when he had his out) but I do have several nasty ulcers. My face swelled up so much that the inside of my cheeks were pushed between my jaws, so, at night, I've no doubt subconsciously been gnawing on them. My orthodontist also told me that my wisdom teeth were some of the most difficult he's had to remove (it took him over an hour to get them all out - normally takes him between 30 and 45 minutes), which doesn't surprise me in the slightest. My teeth have always been difficult little shits.

All I can say is that I'm glad I'll never have to have them out again. And if you think I had fun with four wisdom teeth, I wish Erfun all the best. He has five.

Beer Rage

2005-11-28T22:43:00.000+10:30

After receiving a top secret message from Mathew to join him at the Ed a few weeks ago, my phone promptly self-destructed. Yep, just like in Mission: Impossible. Despite the correlation between my real life and a movie, it was not cool. I had to fork out for a new phone which is particularly frustrating because, unlike Tom Cruise for his role in the movie, I, do not get paid for my role in real life.

However, I digress. I arrived at the Ed, had a drink or two, got freaked out by some of Mat's workmates and then was told about the fitness instructors who were having a bash at the other end of the establishment. Think about the 'Call on Me' video clip and I'm sure you'll agree that fitness instructers are cool. Soon after, I noticed a sign on a door (see below).

This perhaps accounted for the unusually high numbers of older people present that evening. As a representative of the younger community, I believe that there comes a time in the evening when older people should leave. We're talking 10pm-ish, 11pm if they're pushing it. The ones who linger longer know they aren't of a younger age, but still drink as if they were. This leads to a few things, such as embarassment and a disregard for people around them. On two separate occasions, the group I was standing with was split apart at the middle by a large bulldozer of a woman with a curious wobble who was somehow still managing to hold her grip on her glass of wine. On one occasion, contact was made by her to me and I consequently lost some of my beer to the floor. Bitch.

Now, I don't know about you, but that kind of behaviour just pisses me off. I liken the above example to someone who cuts you off in traffic and, in the process, sideswipes your car and the resultant jolt spills the Coke in your cupholder. There is nothing quite as incensing as a knock to a beer. And when the person doesn't apologise for spilling your drink, that's like when you give way to someone on a congested road and they don't wave in recognition. That is the last straw. Firstly, beer is spilled. Secondly, they don't apologise. Now, what do you do? You give them daggers as they walk away and swear profusely at them. This is equivalent to roadrage. This is beer rage. Side effects of beer rage include; temporary bad mood, high blood pressure and a reluctance to buy beer (leading to soberness).

Go to bed. Leave the late nights to us younguns.

Fina-bloody-lly!

2005-11-27T23:50:00.000+10:30

Sorry, folks. My brand new (2+) router died almost two weeks ago so I have been unable to post until now. Although its replacement has yet to arrive, I'm using my old modem in the interim. Hopefully none of you have given up on my blog thinking that I'd done a runner and left the blog-world for good.

The reinstatement of my internet connection has capped off an enjoyable day spent in the sun at the Adelaide Oval. The contest was even (for a change, thankfully) and, after the Windies ripped through our middle-order before lunch, Hussey and MacGill performed quite the revival. Hussey notched his [ultimately unbeaten] century and, in due course, pushed us passed the Windies' first innings total. He is a smart, versatile cricketer and very worthy of a Baggy Green. Anyway, here are a few shots of the action and/or crowd.

Til, Barbara and I (take note - my legs and sombrero were on TV!)

Tristan, Borgas, Brad & our scoreboard

McGrath about to deliver

Some crazy German guy who kept stealing our food

This couple had spent a bit too long under the scoreboard

So, all in all, a grand day out.

Australia vs Uruguay

2005-11-12T16:22:00.000+10:30

People of Australia: it is time to get behind the Socceroos and support them as they take on Uruguay in Montevideo early tomorrow morning. I, for one, will be watching and hoping for a good result.

You may or may not remember the last time the Socceroos played their world cup qualifier. It was more or less four years ago, also versus Uruguay. After a 1-0 victory in the first leg in Australia, the Socceroos travelled to Montevideo for the second leg. Upon arrival at the ground, the Aussie players were spat on, jostled and verbally abused by the Uruguayan fans. Dirty pricks. Fast-forward 90 minutes or so and we have lost 3-0. Goodbye World Cup again.

This time around promises to be different. Our new coach, Dutchman Guus Hiddink, is not inept and our team, if anything, has improved tactically, skilfully and mentally.

Tune in. Coverage on SBS starts at 6.00am tomorrow morning. Kick off at 6.30. Let's really stick it up those bastard Uruguayan fans and their equally bastard coach.

Short Posts

2005-11-11T15:23:00.000+10:30

Posts, my friends, posts. What is a post? Who is a post? Why is a post? Ha, that one doesn't make sense.

FREE BEER!!!

2005-11-10T20:44:00.000+10:30

Ha! Gotcha!

Critical Error

2005-11-10T18:53:00.000+10:30

Please do not be phased by the gosh darn misleading title to this - mon premier - blog! There have been no errors, certainly none critical.

You might be wondering what has happened today...or you might not be. To be completely honest, very little has happened. I've barely breathed. But speaking of misleading titles, I did watch a show on the comedy channel entitled "The World's Funniest". To accurately reflect its content, it would be more suitably called the "Here's Another Appalling Home Video Show Hosted By A Man With Tripe For A Brain And Vomit For A Sense Of Humour" show. Oh dear. That's right, oh dear. I'm sure the guy in charge of pressing the recorded laugh button was tempted to walk off the job.

Well, as they say, time is money (except if you work casually at a photocopy shop and it's your day off, which just so happens to be the case). Time is also food, and I'm hungry.

Over and out-